Originally Posted December 4, 2019 on aprilbellresearch.com

A few years ago, I started having the urge to grow my business. At the time, I wasn’t sure exactly what that would look like but it seemed important to me at the time.  Now I know that the growth I was looking for was within me, not outside of me.

These are the beliefs that were the foundation for my desire to grow:

• Without growth, one becomes stagnant
• It would give my life more purpose, meaning
• I would feel more accomplished
• It would give me more freedom
• I was feeling burnt out

So, I started working on a growth Idea to offer educational tools to teach what we do for large corporations. At one point, I thought I would teach other small business owners to conduct their own marketing research, then the Idea evolved to teaching corporate leaders tools to help them collaborate better when co-creating. 

For the last 3 years, I did what I guess one does when they have an Idea, at least according to this book:  What Do You Do With an Idea? I have been looking at my own navel: wondering about it, dreaming about it, thinking about it, researching it, dabbling in it, telling myself it’s dumb, and then finally, I put it on a shelf.

To be fair to myself, I tried a few things: I went through a strategy process, I drafted an entire online course, created a Mastermind group, tested my idea once, then another time, and it has done a lot of shape shifting in the process.

And through this naval-gazing phase of the process, a name was created for the Idea, and then a trademark application requested. And, as luck would have it, just a few weeks ago I received a letter that it has officially been trademarked.  Thus, a brand name for the Idea on the shelf was established: Made With Empathy™.  Now, I must take it off the shelf, dust it off, and see what happens.

I have been thinking about what holds me back, and it is fear.  I wish fear didn’t hold me back.  I’m fearful of it being a flop, that it won’t be meaningful to others, and that it’s just a stupid Idea, not really what others want or need.  

I’m also fearful of getting laughed at, criticized, rejected. That it will impact the work I already enjoy doing.  I don’t want to change what I love about my work, I just want to “enhance it”, make it shiny and loved…by me.  So, that’s the fight within myself – giving myself permission to do something important for me while wanting it to also have a positive, helpful impact to others. 

I wish it was easier for me to launch a new Idea into the world.  I see (and help others) do it for a living (link back to April bell research group services).  It’s so ironic because I help corporations do what is the hardest thing for me to do – launch their ideas into the world in a way that creates a massive impact – by marrying their Idea with the Needs of others.  After going through my own mental battle to “launch something”, I am even more impressed and in awe with all of the brands, companies and people who bring new products and services to life.

This Idea of Making things with Empathy hit my core because I witness on a consistent basis how ideas can take on form and literally get created out of nothing more than a brainstorm or ideation session.  When a team comes together to collaborate, to get clear on their objectives as a team, set aside their own personal opinions, and begin listening to each other, and those they are trying to create for, magic happens.  It happens almost every time, when teams (and the people within those teams) show up, get present, get out of their own heads, create space to focus, and are willing to resiliently pursue next steps when the idea doesn’t work the 1st time, or the 2nd, or the 3rd.  It’s really incredible.

I get to see great, brilliant people create amazing products and services – and they do it by using a lot of Empathy.  And I get hired to be “the Empathizer” – I get to build a bridge between consumer and creator, between creators.  I get to create space for magic to happen. 

Ironically, I’ve learned a lot about Empathy this last year.  Before then, I didn’t think I had a lot to learn.  If you’ve taken the StrengthFinder test, you may be familiar that Empathy is one of the 34 strengths.  Empathy is my #2 strength, which means I can intuitively and immediately feel and care about other’s feelings.  And my #1 strength is WOO (Winning Others Over) which means I love meeting and getting to know people, as many people as possible.  Perfect for the job I do.

But it doesn’t leave someone with those 2 strengths a lot of room for their own emotions.  I am currently reading a fascinating book by Richard Davidson, The Emotional Life of Your Brain.  In it, he has created an Emotional Style based on 6 dimensions – one of them is Self-Awareness.  I have realized how “Self-Opaque” I am – which means I have been mostly unaware of what I’m feeling most of my life.

What I’m learning is that even though it’s one of my strengths according to StrengthFinder, my ability to Empathize is actually limited due to the lack of it I have for myself.   When one is able to empathize with their own feelings AND with the feelings of others, it creates clarity, and intentional, purposeful action.

Empathy with myself gives me clarity, and with clarity I can see the next action.   It tells me when…

1. I need to stand strong because it’s my truth and I can’t be swayed
2. To find grace to be present with someone else’s experience without taking it on as my own

Empathy – with BOTH self and others – is the key to co-creating and bringing new things to reality. 

So, that’s where this idea originated.  I have conducted over 10,000 hours of focus groups, interviews, co-creation sessions using Empathy, and now I am wondering:  “Why can’t these tools be shifted and used outside the focus group setting to design a more meaningful life with each other?” 

So now my why for growth is different – it’s more meaningful.  I have a vision of creating deeper connections, greater collaborations, and ultimately more joy and meaning in the world.

That’s why I want to create tools, a useful system or process….but I need your help. 

I’m not going to do any more navel gazing. I want to know what’s wanted (what the bigger need or desire is) because if I can understand that, I can customize Made With Empathy ™ so that it’s helping achieve what is most wanted.

If you’re interested, please answer these few questions about what would make Made With Empathy™ tools most meaningful to you – Click here.  

Let’s see where this Idea takes us…